Plans
Today I planned to finish up some projects in my workshop. I did get to them finally, but only after a LONG talk with a young friend who is working through some things in his past.
He was talking about the "information" he was given about relationships and sexuality by his age mates. I was rather taken aback by some of the things he was told were "normal" (he is from overseas, not Japan, though I doubt if he would have fared much better here). As I told him about the Bible's teaching on the subject, he was amazed. Suddenly he realized that there was a reason why he was uncomfortable with the whole idea- he had been told a lot of rubbish. What the Bible has to say sounded a lot more reasonable to him.
For my part, I asked him how many of his friends were happy with their relationships and sex life, and he said- none of them were! It struck me that asking these unhappy people for information was like asking a homeless person for financial and career advice.
Most people's ideas come from the media (Hollywood, famous for successful relationships, right?). They are absorbed, rather than thought through. It seems a lot of people have just about given up on ever having a lasting relationship, but the information is all there, in the Bible. After all, it is the instruction book on life, straight from the Maker. We have a lot of high tech toys, but we aren't any smarter or better than those who came before us. The Bible's information is timeless.
God made one man, then made one woman for him. Marriage is said to be a picture of Christ's relationship to the church- faithful, exclusive, and for life.
In human marriage, sex is a PART of that exclusive, life-long relationship. It is to be intimate- that is, a private act, in a trusting and mutually respectful relationship. Part of it's purpose is fellowship, and part is procreation. To separate it from it's purpose, to make it an end in itself, is to invite disillusionment and disappointment: it becomes an ugly parody of one of God's greatest gifts. This lifetime commitment also provides a stable base for the nurture of children. Sure, sure, you've seen lots of lousy marriages- but you've seen lots of car accidents, too. You don't stop driving, do you? What's needed to prevent disaster in both cases is reponsibility and care
Another common misconception is that marriage is to meet your needs. Really? Are you going to commit to meeting your partner's every need? Don't try it- only God can meet our needs. Our spouse is, rather, a partner in our journey towards God.
I hope you don't think I'm being too "preachy", but if you do, please ask yourself why you don't have the same objection to what you are told on TV.
He was talking about the "information" he was given about relationships and sexuality by his age mates. I was rather taken aback by some of the things he was told were "normal" (he is from overseas, not Japan, though I doubt if he would have fared much better here). As I told him about the Bible's teaching on the subject, he was amazed. Suddenly he realized that there was a reason why he was uncomfortable with the whole idea- he had been told a lot of rubbish. What the Bible has to say sounded a lot more reasonable to him.
For my part, I asked him how many of his friends were happy with their relationships and sex life, and he said- none of them were! It struck me that asking these unhappy people for information was like asking a homeless person for financial and career advice.
Most people's ideas come from the media (Hollywood, famous for successful relationships, right?). They are absorbed, rather than thought through. It seems a lot of people have just about given up on ever having a lasting relationship, but the information is all there, in the Bible. After all, it is the instruction book on life, straight from the Maker. We have a lot of high tech toys, but we aren't any smarter or better than those who came before us. The Bible's information is timeless.
God made one man, then made one woman for him. Marriage is said to be a picture of Christ's relationship to the church- faithful, exclusive, and for life.
In human marriage, sex is a PART of that exclusive, life-long relationship. It is to be intimate- that is, a private act, in a trusting and mutually respectful relationship. Part of it's purpose is fellowship, and part is procreation. To separate it from it's purpose, to make it an end in itself, is to invite disillusionment and disappointment: it becomes an ugly parody of one of God's greatest gifts. This lifetime commitment also provides a stable base for the nurture of children. Sure, sure, you've seen lots of lousy marriages- but you've seen lots of car accidents, too. You don't stop driving, do you? What's needed to prevent disaster in both cases is reponsibility and care
Another common misconception is that marriage is to meet your needs. Really? Are you going to commit to meeting your partner's every need? Don't try it- only God can meet our needs. Our spouse is, rather, a partner in our journey towards God.
I hope you don't think I'm being too "preachy", but if you do, please ask yourself why you don't have the same objection to what you are told on TV.
posted by John Elliot | 10:37 PM
2 Comments:
I think another issue leading to a gap in education (at least one that affected me) is that more often than not the lousy marriages you mention have kids involved somewhere, kids getting no parental example of how things should work. Don't get me wrong, I love my parents dearly they did teach me a lot and I think they brought me up pretty well, just seems their mistakes fall into this section!
But I thank God for married leaders in my church and, of course, my time spent in Ajigasawa that He has provided a whole bunch of good examples I can learn from for when my time rolls around (if indeed it does!)
Particularly liked your comparing lousy marriages to car wrecks: just because you see a lot of wrecks, you don't stop driving.
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